May 17th, 2010

pumpkin pot

The Mystery of the ThinkGeek Order*

It was a rainy Monday night in Austin, Texas. The thunder was so loud that the occupants of [address redacted] had decided to stop killing zombies on their Wii and go downstairs. The husband of the household was sitting on the couch, reading one of the Dresden Files. His wife was seated upon the loveseat, her laptop on her lap, checking social networking sites. There was a rumble in the street that was nothing like the thunder overhead. The husband turned to the wife and said, "That sounds like a delivery truck." The prospect of this excited them both as they were expecting a package from the website known as ThinkGeek. Their doorbell remained suspiciously quiet. There was no knock at their door. The only sound they heard was that of the truck driving away into the night. Thinking no more of it, the couple went back to their evening's entertainments. An hour later the wife, still on her computer, received an email from UPS. Upon reading it, a look of puzzlement crossed her brow. The email said that the package that they had been waiting for had, in fact, been delivered to her porch at the very moment that her husband had heard the delivery truck. The wife rose from the loveseat and looked out the window by the door, but there was no package. She opened the door and looked around, but the package was nowhere to be seen. Her confusion mounting, the wife wandered out barefoot into the rainy night, but it was dark out and the bushes in front of her neighbors' doors made it hard for her to see their porches. Distraught, she and her husband decided to call UPS and see if they could shed any light on this situation. After navigating the treacherous phone system, the wife was finally able to make contact with a person of the UPS customer service department. The nice and apologetic, but ultimately unhelpful, woman of the UPS customer service department informed the wife that she must contact the sender of the goods, but she would also transfer her over to the department that could start an investigation. However, the phone system performed in its usual manner and the wife soon found herself listening to a dial tone. Irritated at the state of events, the husband and wife decided to brave the now lighter rain and look for their package on the porches of their neighbors. They wandered down their street in one direction and then the other, glancing at front doors along the way, but there was nary a package to be seen. Discouraged, they wandered back toward their own empty porch, making plans to contact both ThinkGeek and UPS and voice their displeasure. However, at the last moment, the wife looked upon her next door neighbors porch and low and behold, there was a package sitting there. She slowly made her way up their dark driveway to get a closer look. Huzzah! It was marked with the logo of ThinkGeek. The wife quickly grabbed the package, thankful that there was no one around that she would have to explain her actions to, and brought it into the warmth of her own home, the mystery of the missing package solved.

* This story was sent to ThinkGeek customer service.