Yesterday I found out that this girl i was really close to commited suicide. we were friends in 8th grade, but then she went to live with her dad and we sort of lost touch. Her brother is my honorary brother (blue skunk, except his hair isn't blue anymore). her mom is like my mom. but i'm not really saddened by this. a little, but it's not affecting me much, i'm concerned for her mother though. Had to call the Mad Russian b/c she knew her also. was strange.
She was in my dream last night. I don't really remember much of it. I remember that I was in a house/building of some sort and talking to someone who was reading a book (?). Then I went out to this big place that was like a really large garage, it was metal with a large open area in the back.. then at some point Tamara was there. I can't remember how she looked, but i knew it was her. We were holding hands, facing each other. I was walking backwards towards an altar (?) in the middle of the room. I fell on my knees and was hugging her legs and crying. Then I don't remember what happened. but then i was walking back alone to the room where the person from earlier was.
I think i said my good-bye to Tamara. I want to say that in the dream i begged her not to go and she said she had to, but i can't tell if i just added that afterwards. I think there was something about her prying my hands off of her legs. I do know i was crying a lot. Maybe I got her from that open area and she had to return there. *shrug* I just know i feel closure.